Volcanicast April 14th, 2009

In this week’s volcanicast, we celebrate 100 episodes by making up some crap about Viral Videos, Buddha Boards, and India De Beaufort… Just to name a few.

SHOW NOTES

Apr 4 2009 (SAT)

• NOT VOLCANIC ENOUGH
  5.    lds.org (Mormon website. Dunno or care why now)
  4.    love takes wing (Hallmark TV movie. Yawn)
• 3.    jason mcelwain (BOB)
  - Scottish astronaut
  
  - - Will be the first man on Mars
  
  - Why now?
  
  - - The heretofore unheard of Scottish Space Agency launched a manned mission to Mars
  
  - - - On August 17, 2010, the space craft, manned only by McElwain will arrive at Mars and begin aerobraking
  
  - - - - On August 19, his landing module will separate and land softly near the southeastern end of Valles Marineris
  
  - - - - - Assuming all goes well, a return vehicle will be sent after him.
  
  - - Actually, he’s a basketball player with autism, presented with an award at the NCAA tournament
• 2.    where is villanova university located (SAM)
  - Well, since we are all English Majors….we can work this one out.
  - Villa is a country estate or house. Usually large and used as a retreat.
  - So big house, in any country.
  - Nova is a star that brightens intensely and then gradually dims.
  - As in dies.
  - Putting these two together means a house at the dead star.
  - That should put it in relative proximity of the resturant at the end of the Universe.
  - Why now?
  - Apparently there is a University there.
  - And they finally had 4.
  - Oh they were the final 4.
• 1.    phoenix band (WES)

- New arm band, purportedly burns twice the calories while working out.
- - Their tagline: “Your arm will burn like a phoenix, and a new you will be born”
- No, it’s a band.
- - I dig their music. Kinda pop, kinda alternative.
- - Sadly, they have no free tracks that I could find in 5 minutes of searching, so I’ll forget about them once this show is done.
- Why now?
- - They were on Saturday Night Live.

Apr 5 2009 (SUN)

• NOT VOLCANIC ENOUGH
  20.    montgomery gentry (Country singer. At the Academy of Country Music Awards)
  19.    oklahoma octopus (?)
  18.    jennifer nettles (Country singer. At the Academy of Country Music Awards)
  17.    sugarland (Country group. At the Academy of Country Music Awards)
  16.    www.cbs.com (See #10)
  14.    dennis lee (Scammer, apparently)
  13.    country music awards (See every other topic)
  12.    there once was a man from nantucket (Limerick starter, I’m sure at the ACMAs)
  11.    kenny chesney (Country singer. At the Academy of Country Music Awards)
  10.    cbs.com (Where you could watch the ACMA)
  9.    wounded warrior project (Helps wounded soldiers)
  8.    reba mcentire (Country singer. At the Academy of Country Music Awards)
  7.    trace adkins (Country singer. At the Academy of Country Music Awards)
  6.    george strait (Country singer. At the Academy of Country Music Awards)
  5.    miranda lambert (Country singer. At the Academy of Country Music Awards)
  4.    troubadour (George Strait hit, sung at ACM)
• 3.    heidi newfield (SAM)
  Related Term: 15.johnny and june
  - Why does the name Heidi make me think of The Sound of Music?
  - That has been sung for 1000 years?
  - Maybe it was a childrens book from years ago about a youdling Heidi that always makes me think of that.
  - I bet it’s another book that Bob hasn’t read.
  - I wonder when bob learnt to read…
  - And speaking of youdling Heidi’s…
  - WHy now?
  - She happens to be a country singer.
• 2.    lady antebellum (BOB)
  - Literally it means “woman of noble status after (the) war”
  
  - - Figuratively, it’s the name of McElwain’s space craft
  
  - Why now?
  
  - - Actually a FOTSFTWE 11/14/08
  
  - - - Another Country Music Awards show
  
  - - - - Why?
  
• 1.    viral video (WES)
  - A viral video is a video that, if you watch it, you die.
  - - Like that movie “The Ring”
  - - Where there was no ring. But there was a video.
  - - - That if you watched it, you died.
  - No?
  - - Okay, it’s a video that everybody starts watching and posting on their blogs and Twitter, and Facebook and MySpace and MyFaceSpace and FaceMyCraigsSpaceListSter and all the other awesome places on the internet.
  - - So it spreads like a virus.
  - Why now?
  - - It seems to be the Country Music Awards day, so I’ll say Billy Ray Cyrus was in a viral video that they showed on the big screen behind the stage that all these award type shows always have.

Apr 6 2009 (MON)

• NOT VOLCANIC ENOUGH
  THE BELOW TOPICS ARE SPOILERS FOR THE TELEVISION SHOW “HOUSE”
  THE ONES THAT BLATANTLY SPOIL THE EPISODE HAVE BEEN BLACKED OUT
  IF YOU DO NOT WANT TO READ THIS SPOILER, DO NOT HIGHLIGHT THE TEXT
  19.    house characters (See #1)
  18.    house md (See #1)
  17.    house tv show (See #1)
  15.    kutner suicide (See #1)
  13.    house.com (See #1)
  12.    kalpen suresh modi (See #1)
  11.    fox.com house (See #1)
  10.    fox kutner (See #1)
  9.    kal penn leaving house (See #1)
  8.    kutner memorial (See #1)
  7.    fox house (See #1)
  6.    did kal penn die (See #1)
  5.    lawrence kutner (See #1)
  4.    kal penn (See #1)
  3.    fox.com/kutner (See #1)
  2.    kal penn death (See #1)
  1.    house kutner (Spoiler. Autoskip)
• 20.    dean smith (BOB)
  - The fictional dean of the fictional university Faber College
  
  - - The setting of the classic college comedy, Animal House
  
  - - - Another movie I’ve never seen, but obviously should have
  - - Played by Canadian actor John Vernon
  
  - Why now?
  
  - - It aired in place of a recently canceled TV show
  - - - Some program I’d never heard of: American Idol
  - - Actually, he’s a basketball coach
  
  - - - Mentioned during NCAA tourney coverage
• 16.    buddha board (SAM)
  - Lil kim.
  - Not to be confused with American Idol Lil…
  - This lil is short for little…because she is tiny.
  - AI lil is short for Lily.
  - Now Buddah was a dude that lived in India way back.
  - LIke when bob and Wes were born.
  - Ok, a few years before them…but who is counting.
  - He started the religion Buddhism.
  - You know…Karma, treat people like crap and come back as a dung beetle sorta stuff.
  - Board.
  - This is what our listeners are…Oh…sorry, this is as in a plank of wood.
  - Why now?
  - So LIttle kim was boasting that she uses a board made outta Buddah.
  - While she was dancing.
• 14.    josh pastner (WES)
  - He’s Memphis’ new head coach.
  - - For Basketball.
  - - Their team name is the Tigers.
  - - I bet he’ll be great.

Apr 7 2009 (TUE)

• NOT VOLCANIC ENOUGH
  SOME OF THE BELOW TOPICS ARE SPOILERS FOR THE TELEVISION SHOW “HOUSE”
  THE ONES THAT BLATANTLY SPOIL THE EPISODE HAVE BEEN BLACKED OUT
  IF YOU DO NOT WANT TO READ THIS SPOILER, DO NOT HIGHLIGHT THE TEXT
  20.    earthquake los angeles (4.5, so nobody even noticed it)
  19.    red sox radio (Boston has the best fans, apparently, or the ones who know the least about their team’s radio station)
  18.    i can t make you love me lyrics (I can’t make your heart feel, something it won’t)
  17.    queen noor (Queen of Jordan. On Colbert)
  16.    did kal penn die (Spoiler, from previous day)
  13.    lawrence kutner (Spoiler, from previous day)
  12.    american idol april 7 2009 (Yeah it was on, we get it)
  11.    the search is over (Sung on AI, apparently poorly)
  9.    house kutner (Spoiler, from previous day)
  8.    etta james (Singer, FOTS, on Dancing with the Stars)
  7.    fox.com/kutner (Spoiler, from previous day)
  6.    alaska earthquake information center (Mount Redoubt’s 1-2 punch)
  5.    kal penn death (Spoiler, from previous day)
  
• 3.    justin gimelstob (BOB)
  - The “real” name of the character McLovin in the 2007 comedy Superbad
  - - When acquiring a fake ID Gimelstob uses the name McLovin (presumably a surname; there is no first name)
  - - - A 27 year old from Hawaii
  - Why now?
  - - The actor who played him, Christopher Mintz-Plasse was killed in a tragic folding chair accident
  - - Actually, he’s a tennis commentator
  - - - Presumably mentioned in connection with tennis coverage
  - - I think Mintz-Plasse is fine
  
• 2.    all she wants to do is dance (WES)
  - And make romance.
  - - It’s a song, originally by Don Henley
  - - - Unlike the last song we covered by Don Henley, I know this one.
  - - - I distinctly remember watching the video during my early teen years, and liking very much how she wanted to dance.
  - - - - And make romance.
  - Why now?
  - - It was on American Idol, and I can only assume it was infinitely lamer than that video.
• 1.    adam lambert mad world (SAM)
  Related Terms: 15.adam lambert april 7; 14.gary jules; 10.adam lambert top 8; 4.tears for fears mad world
  - Adam is the screwed up emo on AI.
  - Who I believe idolises Trent Resnor.
  - NiN for those of you who don’t know.
  - He makes Tori Amos seem like a sweet innocent butterfly loving little girl.
  - Why now?
  - So…He sang an emo song.
  - Ok. Cricket story time!
  - This one day…at cricket camp…
  - Oh look, it’s break time.

Apr 8 2009 (WED)

• NOT VOLCANIC ENOUGH
  18.    american idol top 7 (yawn)
  17.    snogging (British for kissing)
  15.    belcourt castle (On Ghost Hunters)
  14.    can t get you out of my head (Song, on Idol)
  13.    model behavior (2000 TV-movie, on somewhere)
  12.    amber tamblyn (In #10)
  11.    frankie valli (More AI crap)
  10.    the unusuals (New ABC TV show)
  9.    justin gimelstob (From previous day)
  8.    american idol april 8 (It was on)
  7.    uss bainbridge (Related to #6 somehow :)
  6.    splice the mainbrace (Relatd to #7 somehow)
  2.    adam lambert mad world (From previous day)
• 5.    marvin webster (BOB)
  - American lexicographer
  
  - - His name has come to be synonymous with American dictionaries
  
  - - - He wrote his first dictionary in 1806
  
  - - - - And the standard by which others would be judged, An American Dictionary of English Language, followed in 1807
  
  - Why now?
  
  - - Due to a cock up of monumental proportions, the bicentennial celebration of the accomplishment took place two years and three days late
  
  - - Actually, he’s a former NBA player
  
  - - - Found dead in a hotel room
  
  - - - A dude named Noah Webster did the dictionary thing
  

• 4.    kelly pickler (WES)
  Related Term: 16.kelly pickler plastic surgery
  - A large (Usually 2 gallon or more) jar for pickling cucumbers, used primarily in Ireland.
  - The difference between this jar and typical pickling jars is that the size and shape of this jar holds a Leaf of Kelly Cucumbers.
  - - Kelly Cucumbers are native to Ireland and are known for growing to a very uniform size.
  - - A Leaf of Kelly cucumbers is the typical yield from a Kelly plant, or 17 cucumbers.
  - Why now?
  - - On American Idol, one of the singers - I presume a native of Ireland - mentioned how she grew up in a Kelly Pickling factory.
  - - I couldn’t find her name by show time, but her picture is in the show notes.
• 1.    frankie avalon (SAM)
  Related Term: 3.venus song
  - Tean idol from when Simon was born.
  - Why now?
  - Since they were doing birth year on AI this week, the decided to make Simon feel Really old.
  - By having a 70 year old guy belt out his song from 1959.
  -And Venus was the name of the song.
  - Everyone was star struck
  - Or rather Planet struck…

Apr 9 2009 (THU)

• NOT VOLCANIC ENOUGH
  20.    pawnee indiana (Fictional town in a new TV show)
  19.    wnba draft (It started with Angel McCoughtry)
  17.    jesikah maximus (Hot model. I don’t care why now)
  16.    harpers island (New TV show, pilot just aired on CBS)
  14.    hot for words (Related to #7)
  13.    you don t have an inbox…yet (I do. I have like 8. Hotmail was doing it)
  12.    dan miller (Nashville TV anchor, Died at 67)
  8.    darryl schnell (Related to #1? I don’t think so but maybe)
  7.    hotforwords (User name of girl geek Marina Orlova)
  5.    frankie avalon (From previous day)
• 6.    ineffable (SAM)
  - Wes thinks this is what I am.
  - So…english majors….lets find out what this is.
  - It does not mean f-able.
  - nore does it mean un-f-able.
  - In….in this case, does not mean Indiana.
  - Hmm, In means many things. Like: Contained by, wearing, at the end of, employed, using, into, because of and affected by.
  - So at the end of the day I am contained by what I am wearing and using it for my employment.
  - Eff…As in before, so used before F words to mean done before.
  - Able…Have enough power, skilled, talented, having qualities of, and my personal Favs…Capable of being ______ed, and Worthy of being _____ed.
  - I kid you not….thank you websters!
  - Why now?
  - So…you are affected by my talents before I am capable of being ____ed.
  - (It really means inexpressible…which is after my talents, or too sacres to be spoken…)

• 4.    india de beaufort (BOB)
  Related Terms: 10.krod mandoon
  - Because Europeans were idiots in the 15th century, everything in the Western Hemisphere was named India
  - - It never occurred to them that there might be another continent here
  - - - So, you’ve got Indians, West Indies, and India de Beaufort, which lies in what is present-day Quebec
  - - - - So named because the initial French explorers found the natives to be both attractive (beau) and strong (fort).
  - Why now?
  - - Actually, she’s an actress in Comedy Central’s new series: Krod Mandoon
  - - - Mrowr
• 1.    nick adenhart (WES)
  Related Terms: 18.angels baseball; 15.andrew thomas gallo; 11.anaheim angels; 9.la angels; 3.los angeles angels; 2.angels pitcher
  - Baseball pitcher for the Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim
  - Why now?
  - - A rookie, Nick started his first MLB game by throwing 6 scoreless innings.
  - - And then, tragedy struck.
  - - The rest of the pitching staff managed to lose the game 6-4.
  - - And that’s all.
  - - Oh, and he died in a car crash on the way home from the game.
  - - - A Drunk driver with a suspended license (for drunk driving) plowed into his car, killing him and two others.
  - - - The drunk driver, as always, was perfectly fine. So much so that he fled the scene.
  - - - He was caught within the hour and I hope California still has the death penalty, because this bastard has at least 2 strikes and I’d bet more.

Apr 10 2009 (FRI)

• NOT VOLCANIC ENOUGH
  19.    mena arkansas (Tornado!)
  18.    shante broadus (Snoop Dog’s wife. Not dead, just pretending to be Vince McMahon)
  17.    matt quinn (Repeorter, died in the Texas wildfires)
  16.    johanna cox (Alec Baldwin’s new girlfriend, half his age, yadda yadda yadda. You know the drill)
  15.    claire sweeney (British actress, alleged that Bill Clinton hit on her. I got news for you, sweetie…)
  13.    hanky panky underwear (Meow)
  12.    my cousin vinny (Best. Movie. Evar)
  11.    science friday (NPR show, unclear why now)
  10.    skylar deleon power ranger (I said #5 was a power ranger)
  9.    vilified (Someone, perhaps VP Joe Biden, said it on TV)
  8.    henry ford community collge (Site of a murder suicide)
  6.    murfreesboro tn (A tornado hit it)
  5.    skylar deleon (A power ranger, given the death sentence in real life)
  4.    fuzzy zoeller tiger woods (Golfers, at least one of whom is playing)
• 3.    gore vidal (WES)
  - American writer and politician.
  - - Wrote 1948’s The City And The Pillar, one of the first mainstream American novels to feature unambiguous homosexuality.
  - - - People asked, and people told.
  - - He was also openly bisexual, having affairs with both men and women, including Anaïs Nin and (completely apocryphal) Paul Newman.
  - In 1968, he was on a very short lived commentary show with William F. Buckley
  - - In the show, Buckley called war protesters “Pro-Nazi”
  - - Vidal countered that Buckley was the Nazi.
  - - Buckley posited that Vidal was a queer, and offered to introduce his fist to Vidal’s face.
  - - Like I said, the show did not last long.
  - Anyway, why now?
  - - Vidal was on Real Time with Bill Maher.
  - - - I’m going to take a stab and guess he got on a little better with Maher than he did with Buckley.
• 2.    pahokee florida (SAM)
  Related Term: 7.pahokee fl
  - It’s a poke little town in Florida.
  - Where they invented the Hokey Pokey dance.
  - It is so small it isn’t even in Websters.
  - It is a town where there are more guns than people.
  - and the gang run the nights.
  - Why now?
  - It’s was actually a sad story on the 48 hr special about ” If I only had a gun”
  - A special showing that in a desperate time, people can’t get their guns out.
  - They took people from different gun experience backrounds and found that when in a senerio of a lecture, having a gunman walk in on the class, everyone went for cover. THose with the “gun” couldn’t get it out of the holster, or stood up to shoot and were ” killed” first.
  - Even those with gun range experienced a compete freeze.
  - This is from the body’s natural fight or flight syndrome.
  - When something unexpected etc happend, the body pulls blood from the skin, surface and extremities and dumps the blood into the muscles incase they have to be used to get away quickly.
  - THis means that the people who had enough sence to take cover, couldn’t get the gun out because their fingers were numb from lack of blood.
  - Even the guy with over 500 hours on a gun range had this problem.
  - THey were making the point that going out to buy a gun to protect yourself usually won’t, will draw attention to yourself and most likely get you shot…and just practicing how to shoot doesn’t mean you have the skills in an immergency.
  - Why now?
  - a kid that was on the 48 hr team as a correspondent for the Obama inauguration did a documentary about the guns in his home town…and wants to know when and what Obama can do about it.
  - 80% of the kids have known someone shot and killed by guns in that town.
  - 50% of them saw the killing.
• 1.    m4m (BOB)
  Related Term: 14.2m4m
  - Programming language
  - - Designed to produce object code which can run on any and all platforms
  - - - Much like Java, only people don’t use it almost exclusively to write single platform apps that run significantly slower than a good, native app
  - - - It combines the terseness of COBOL and the readability of PERL
  - - - - Making it practically undebuggable
  - - - - - Unless thoroughly documented
  - - - - - - Hahahaha
  - Why now?
  - - The source code for the cornfucker virus has emerged
  - - - And it’s written in m4m
  - - Actually, it’s from a TV ad by homophobic busybodies

• Podcast